Confessions of a Photographer: I Hate Having My Photo Taken

Imagine this scenario:

You’re with a group of friends, out and about, celebrating your birthday (or some other special occasion) and someone says the dreaded words: “Ok guys, let’s take a picture!!!” Your hands get sweaty, and your mind starts racing: “what’s my good angle again?”, “does my face look stupid?”, “I remember last year’s photo, I was blinking in like all of them!!!”.

Someone yells, “Say cheese!!!”, you put on your best grin, and hope for the best. You hold your breath as everyone crowds around the camera to take a look. “Oh man, Irene’s blinking in this one again… Let’s do a second round!"

how I feel about getting my photo taken

I have a tough time liking the way I look in photos. Out of a batch of 20, I’ll MAYBE like 1 or 2. It has been a painful experience since I’ve been young and every year becoming more aware of the way I look. My nose and mouth working together to create a crescent moon if I face to the side… My crooked smile with uneven laugh lines… the bags under my eyes. These are all flaws I used to pick apart in EVERY photo, and then I’d just look away in disdain and pretend it never happened/delete the photo.

In recent years, with the rise of the body positivity movement, I’ve been learning to slowly tolerate the flaws I used to pick apart. Notice how I say tolerate. I am a firm believer that the first step on the journey to body positivity is body neutrality. The acceptance of your body as it exists and recognizing what it does for you, as well as the non-physical characteristics, taking importance over your appearance. And even if you just stay at body neutrality, that is AMAZING. Our bodies do so much for us, and it’s not fair for us to criticize them when they work so hard every day to keep us alive. I’m still working on the positivity part, but that’ll come.

Now, when I see photos of myself and see my side profile… I think about how beautiful it is that my head allows me to think, and eat, and speak, no matter what angle it’s at. When I see my smile, I’m thankful that it is able to express happy emotions to myself and to others, and how good it feels to do the thing. When I see the bags under my eyes… I’m thankful that I have skin covering my skull and not exposed flesh. LOL. I’m still working on that one, but cover-up does the trick.

What does that mean for me as a photographer?

Picking up my own camera has made me extremely aware that many others also have the same experience as I do when taking photos. Over the years, I’ve learned to take inventory of the details that people may be noticing about themselves in photos, as I notice about myself. Not the physical flaws (because everyone is fighting different demons), but the things that can be fixed in 30 seconds or less.

For example, the hair that is out of place, the spinach in someone’s teeth, the tag sticking out of their shirt/bra/undies. I have learned to keep an eye out for all of these things when photographing my clients because fixing things DURING the shoot is MUCH easier than editing them after. And it just goes to show that I pride myself on attention to detail.

Something I ALWAYS make sure to do during a photoshoot (or taking any photo at all) is to be direct and clear in my communication. My BIGGEST uncomfortability when I get photographed is not knowing what I look like, and not knowing if what the heck I’m doing is right, and I’m sure you feel exactly the same way. All of that can be eased by the photographer communicating thoroughly, letting you know what to do next, and even showing the back of the camera to ease your mind! (All things I do, btw.)

My favourite moment during a shoot is the beginning - when the client may be a bit nervous to get their photo taken, but then I take the lead and pose them and let them know what to do with their facial expression… then I just see this sigh of relief and they’re able to comfortably enjoy the rest of their session because they know they’re in good hands. THEN I GET TO SHOW THEM THE BACK OF MY CAMERA AND HOW AMAZING THEY LOOK AND YEAH, THAT FEELING RIGHT THERE. THAT’S WHY I’M A PHOTOGRAPHER.

I will level with you. I think I’ve only had a handful of times where I was comfortable in front of a camera, and yet I think I have a lot of good photos that came out of when I wasn’t comfortable as well. I take every step to make sure that you are comfortable AND have a great time at your shoot. You don’t have to love every single photo - I certainly don’t even love every single photo I take of myself! But you will fall in love with some of the photos (at least), and you’ll wonder why you didn’t do this sooner.

Having photos done can do wonders for your confidence. So do your research, talk to your photographer, and go for it. I’m here to shatter any and all of the negative self-talk and give you the confidence of a lifetime.

Like I said, you don’t have to walk away loving all of your photos, but even if you fall in love with only a few, it makes a world of difference.